this has nothing to do with striving.

i find it easier to live for myself rather than die to myself. to save myself rather than let the false me drip into
non-existence. i am getting ready to hand in my resignation for work, mostly because i don’t feel much purpose there.
i don’t feel excited about what i do. we need purpose in the things we do. those that think otherwise have become jaded
by life being consistently unsatisfying. this is nothing about always being satisfied. it is learning what it means to live out of the you God has intended for you to be. there is more. there always is. this has nothing to do with striving to find that person. it has everything to do with the discovery and beautiful unraveling of you that was meant to be. we can embrace that, but to do so we have to let go of the us we think we should be or others think we should be. this includes about callin out our junk. for instance, i hate rejection. hate it. so i tend to exaggerate and lie my way through self-preservation. and that will be the death of me if i continue on. we must begin seeing ourselves as capable,honest and vulnerable people who have it in us to change the world. i am on way….

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